Concentration...

After winning several archery contests, the young and rather boastful champion challenged a Zen master who was renowned for his skill as an archer. The young man demonstrated remarkable technical proficiency when he hit a distant bull's eye on his first try, and then split that arrow with his second shot. "There," he said to the old man, "see if you can match that!"
Undisturbed, the master did not draw his bow, but rather motioned for the young archer to follow him up the mountain. Curious about the old fellow's intentions, the champion followed him high into the mountain until they reached a deep chasm spanned by a rather flimsy and shaky log. Calmly stepping out onto the middle of the unsteady and certainly perilous bridge, the old master picked a far away tree as a target, drew his bow, and fired a clean, direct hit. "Now it is your turn," he said as he gracefully stepped back onto the safe ground. Staring with terror into the seemingly bottomless and beckoning abyss, the young man could not force himself to step out onto the log, no less shoot at a target. "You have much skill with your bow," the master said, sensing his challenger's predicament, "but you have little skill with the mind that lets loose the shot."

Assumptions........

A certain man asked the famous Mulla Nasrudin, "What is the meaning of fate?"

Mulla replied, "Assumptions."

"In what way?" the man asked again.

Mulla looked at him and said, "You assume things are going to go well and when they do not, you call that bad luck. You assume things are going to go badly and when they do not, you call that good luck. You assume certain things are going to happen or not happen a certain way, but you do not know what is going to actually happen. You assume the future is unknown. When you are caught out (things do not work out for you), you call that Fate."

Note: This story is one of many about the interesting character, "Mulla Nasrudin." It is an old Persian tale. On a different note, my mother who has not read this story, once said to me, "When things do not go the way we want them to, we wrongly blame Fate!"

Life lessons from Michael Phelps

At 23, Michael Fred Phelps has become an international sporting sensation.

The young American swimmer has smashed seven world records and won eight gold medals at the Beijing Olympics, the first athlete ever to secure first place so many times at a single Olympics Games.


And what life lessons do his struggles and successes hold for us?

Deal with your own issues effectively -- Michael certainly dealt with ADHD and his parents' divorce that way. His mother helped him cope up with his condition and channeled his energy into what he loved.

Cut out the drama -- Michael's story is inspirational but at the same time, neither the young man nor his family have exploited their experiences to sensationalise his life. They've told it like it is.

Zero in on your strengths and overcome your weaknesses -- He was less than an average student at school, but Michael was a passionate and dedicated student of his sport. The young swimmer is known to have studied tapes of his races over and over, zeroing in on mistakes and working towards bettering himself constantly. Excellent is still not good enough.

Remain focused on your goals -- At the Athens Olympics back in 2004, Phelps was beaten by teammate Ian Crocker beat in the 100m butterfly. He put up a poster of Crocker in his room to motivate him and keeps a list of his career goals beside his bed.

Pursue what you love with passion and put in a genuine effort -- Phelps' dedication to swimming was apparent back when he was nine and began to break national records in his age group. His commitment to what he does has grown with him.

It's not just his career and his unbelievable performance at the Olympics that classify Phelps as a winner -- it's his story of inspiration that makes him a real champion, a youth icon, somebody to look up to.

Improve your aim, improve your life!

One of the greatest discoveries a man makes , to one of his great surprise,is to find he can do what he was afraid he couldn't do. To explain this let me take you through a small story.

There was a king with a small army, the captain of the army was not confident to win a war with another country.so, the king went for a toss by starting if we get a head ,God is with us,we will win and if we get the other side we will lose the battle.they won the toss, warriors were motivated and fought with the hope that god was with them.at last they won the war.

The captian told the king "only bcoz God is with us ! victory came. The king laughed and showed the coin which had the same on both side and said,no with the hope of having God with us,we fought with strong will power! which paves the way for victory.the kings action ,was nothing but motivation and extension of positive thinking within the soldeirs, if one possess strong will power, he can win anything,anywhere and anytime.

Sachin Tendulkar,Sania Mirza,Kalpana Chawla,Leander Paes,Joshna Chinappa,Narein Kartikeyan....etc, who did the country proud by thier achievements in respective fields only due to their will power and positive thinking.
We all have dreams which are different in every aspect.Our dream may indicate the great possibilities that are in store for us in the future years to come. A dream may precede all big works and achievements.But even for converting dreams into reality, the role of positive thinking is very important.

You, all need to show the world is the results of your positive thinking, not the blue print of your dream.the world expects results. do not talk to them about your labour pain,instead show them the little baby. everything depends upon the human mind, which is capable of creating positive and negative thinking.it is our duty to train our mind to have full of positive thinking. the route cause of success, which not only avoids failure and brings the name and fame to live even after bidding farewell to this world. Always remember nothing great was ever achieved with out enthusiasm.

It's simple to train your brain ; ask yourself how was your day ? if your answer is "great" then you have started training your brain to think positive.

14 Laws of Charming Personality!!

Charm is an charismatic thing which strikes the sight & leaves it impression in heart. that's why first impression is the last impression. Use the following laws to make your personality more & more charming. As follows,
Law : 1 - Control Your Moods :- Make a habit of breaking bad moods. always trying to be nice with peoples & being nice to the people only when you want i.e. as per your mood makes the difference, So it is better to control your moods.
Law : 2 - Offer understanding, Empathy & help.
Law : 3 - Don't desire to be center of attraction, Create your own influence.
Law : 4 - Avoid Fault finding, Spend time to analyze yourself.
Law : 5 -Give Encouragement & Appreciation.
Law : 6 - Avoid desiring to be considered as superior.
Law : 7 - Show Interest.
Law : 8 - Be Co-operative, helpful & Generous.
Law : 9 - Be pleasent & look cheerful.
Law :10 - Be enthusiastic & energetic.
Law :11 - Spread Genuine love & being loved.
Law :12 - Look pleased to see peoples, While speaking be proactive.
Law :13 - Be Nice to the people.
Law :14 - Avoid talking back of the peoples.
Just 14 laws is not the standard set, it is the basic primer for personality.You can create your own laws, you will be able to create your own 14000 laws as you keep on analyzing yourself, learning yourself, analyzing your real self. The more we study our-self, we will come to know more about our-self.
There is no excellent book which will help you to be charming, but, yes, there is an one perfect book which will help you & guide you to be CHARMING and that is your own MIND.

Skills that Enhance Emotional Intelligence

Many different factors contribute to an individual's emotional intelligence, including a person's ability to deal with anger and anxiety and the degree to which a person displays empathy. In addition, researchers Thomas Hatch and Howard Gardner have identified four social skills that contribute to and enhance emotional intelligence and help combat social ineptitudes. These four social skills are described below.
1. An ability to organize groups
A person with this skill possesses the ability to initiate and coordinate the efforts of various people to reach toward common goals. Individuals who can organize groups demonstrate leadership skills, have an ability to relate to people from various backgrounds, and understand what motivates people. In addition, they are capable of offering direction comfortably.
2. An ability to negotiate solutions
Individuals who are able to negotiate have a unique talent for mediating. Not only can these individuals resolve conflicts when they occur, but in many cases, they are capable of keeping the lid on trouble when it's brewing. People who are skilled at negotiation focus on solutions and actions, rather than on problems and roadblocks.
3. An ability to make personal connections
Some people seem to naturally sense and relate to other people's feelings. These people, who are skilled in making personal connections, recognize and respond in appropriate ways to the feelings and concerns of others. They make great team players and business partners, and get along well with virtually everyone because they are so quick to read the emotional climate. This skill helps individuals succeed as sales people, managers, and teachers.
4. An ability to perform social analyses
Social analysis is the skill of knowing and understanding how other people are feeling. This can lead to easy intimacy or, at the very least, the ability to build rapport quickly.
To succeed in both professional and social environments, you need a number of social skills, including the four skills described above. To make a better social impression, self-assess your own social skills and determine your strengths and weaknesses. With this knowledge, you can build on your strengths, overcome your weaknesses, and succeed in every environment.

Do you have the right questions????

The seeker asked, Why do bad things happen to good people? The Pastor replied, When the question itself is wrong, how do you expect me to answer? The question should have been, 'What happens to good people when bad things happen to them' and the reply is, 'They become better people'!

It is not our intelligence, but it is the direction of our intelligence that determines the pace of our progress. And, our intelligence can be directed,if only we know, how to ask the right questions. Ask, Why me? for all your troubles and listen to the response of your intelligence. Again ask,Why me? for all your countless blessings and again listen to the voice of your intelligence. Experience the difference. Experience the power of questions. Questions have great power. One right question asked at the right time can change the direction of our intelligence, and thus change the direction of our life.

Why is this happening to me? sets your intelligence in one direction,which will lead you to self-pity, while in the same scenario ask, What can I learn from this? and this will direct you to a higher maturity. Why does she not understand me? will lead your intelligence to blame the other and it makes you feel victimised. Instead try What should my approach be to make her understand me? and you will feel you are still in control of the situation. It puts you in a more resourceful and responsible position.

If you are feeling stagnant, if you are not growing at the pace at which you can grow, if you are going in the direction that will not lead you to your goals, if you are encountering issues that are repetitive in nature, then be sure, you are not asking the right questions. Hence, you are not directing your intelligence right.

Simple questions like,What next,How can I do what I am already doing even better, What is the worst that can possibly happen can completely change the way you perceive life. Our intelligence has an inherent compulsion to answer any question that is posed to it, either by you or by
the world. So, choose your questions and direct your intelligence in constructive ways.

One man asked, Why is the apple falling down? and the world has not been the same ever since. In fact, all inventions and discoveries begin with a question. Arjuna with his questions gave a direction to Krishna's intelligence, which is the Bhagavad-Gita.

It doesn't matter if you don't have all the answers. What truly matters is, do you have the right questions? Your intelligence is waiting Ask and you shall receive.

Mouse Trap...

A mouse looked through the crack in the wall to see the farmer and his wife open a package.

What food might this contain? The mouse wondered - he was devastated to discover it was a mousetrap.

Retreating to the farmyard, the mouse proclaimed the warning : There is a mousetrap in the house! There is a mousetrap in the house!

The chicken clucked and scratched, raised her head and said, " Mr.Mouse , I can tell this is a grave concern to you, but it is of no consequence to me." " I cannot be bothered by it."

The mouse turned to the pig and told him, "There is a mousetrap in the house! There is a mousetrap in the house!" The pig sympathized, but said, I am so very sorry, Mr. Mouse, but there is nothing I can do about it but pray. "Be assured you are in my prayers."

The mouse turned to the cow and said "There is a mousetrap in the house! There is a mousetrap in the house!" The cow said, "Wow, Mr. Mouse. I'm sorry for you, but it's no skin off my nose."

So, the mouse returned to the house, head down and dejected, to face the farmer's mousetrap alone.

That very night a sound was heard throughout the house -- like the sound of a mousetrap catching its prey.

The farmer's wife rushed to see what was caught. In the darkness, she did not see it was a venomous snake whose tail the trap had caught. The snake bit the farmer's wife. The farmer rushed her to the hospital , and she returned home with a fever.

Everyone knows you treat a fever with fresh chicken soup, so the farmer took his hatchet to the farmyard for the soup's main ingredient.

But his wife's sickness continued, so friends and neighbours came to sit with her around the clock.

To feed them, the farmer butchered the pig.

The farmer's wife did not get well; she died.

So many people came for her funeral, the farmer had the cow slaughtered to provide enough meat for all of them.

The mouse looked upon it all from his crack in the wall with great sadness.

So, the next time you hear someone is facing a problem and think it doesn't concern you, remember -- when one of us is threatened, we are all at risk. We are all involved in this journey called life. We must keep an eye out for one another and make an extra effort to encourage one another.

I understand, When ego comes, everything else goes.

Good Article i come across....

The first major thrill after one learns cycling is to take the hands off the handlebar when the cycle is still in motion. The craving is not for the act, but to get noticed. In fact, the eyes wander with longing to see if others have noticed you perform the act. Everyone goes through this phase of life where the ego drives one to do anything and everything only to get noticed and recognised. It is a phase when good is good only when it gains attention; even bad is good if it can draw attention, and ironically, even good is bad if it fails to attract attention.The ego survives on gaining attention. But then, one must outgrow that phase of life.

It is disheartening to see that so many adults, so-called successful people, celebrities included, continue to do things only to seek attention. They never outgrow the clutches of their ego. True, ego can be a source of motivation; but then, ego is a very poor motivator. By its very nature, ego needs feeding; and hence it is a perpetual beggar. The problem with ego is that when ego is fed, you struggle with a superiority complex, and when ego is starved, you suffer from an inferiority complex. Either way it robs you of your peace of mind. The price ego asks of you to be your motivator is your peace of mind. Why would you sell your hair to buy a comb?
It is suffice to know you are holy; there is no need to feel holier than thou

How often, instead of killing our ego and developing a relationship, we kill the relationship and develop our ego.How many precious relationships must have been lost in order to satisfy one's ego? How many golden opportunities must have been missed while you were busy servicing your ego?

An ego-filled heart is always walking on fire. Every moment is heavy, every situation is nerve-racking and every interaction is tense. Never can there be a moment of marriage between ego and ease. With ego, you are struggling all the time to win over the situation; you want to get the better of others. When you transcend ego,you just want to win over yourself; you want to make the most of your own potential. It is you versus you and not you versus the rest.

A crow which was carrying a piece of meat in its beak found itself being chased by all the other birds. It dropped the piece of meat and all the birds went after the meat. Now, alone in the sky, the crow remarked, In losing that piece of meat, I gained the freedom of the skies. Drop the piece of meat - ego, and gain the freedom of peaceful living.

When ego comes, everything else goes. When ego goes, everything else comes. Let your ego, go. How to let go of ego? Simple! Value your peace above everything else...

You Are What You Think

You are responsible for your thinking. Change your thinking and life will get better. But, what thoughts do you change? Your troublesome thoughts about a situation can easily be found in your self-talk. Self-talk is that inner running dialogue you have with yourself. It is what you tell yourself about life's situations.

All of us have a voice that talks to us. You might think of it as your conscience. It might be that "inner observer" who seems to sits in the corner and watches everything you do. You may recognize it as that voice that starts talking to you upon awakening in the morning. Sometimes it may wait until you look in the mirror before it actually speaks. It is that voice that says, "You sure are handsome." or "What a wonderful person you are." Or "You are going to have a great day." It might say, "You are so slim and your hair looks beautiful." If you don’t' recognize this voice then yours may be speaking to you in a different tone. You might be hearing, "You look like crap today" or "You sure have gained a lot of weight." "Your hair is a mess." "It's is a terrible day! Get back in bed." This voice, the negative, critical one, is one of the main reasons we have so many problems. It can destroy resiliency by opening the flood gates and draining away your energy.

This voice can make anything worse. You may be like most people and know how to take any small problem, think about it for awhile, and have a bigger problem. That little voice keeps telling you what might go wrong. All of the dark possibilities are pointed out. The imagination creates a very bad situation. The problem goes from a mild annoyance to a major catastrophe as you convince yourself that the imagined situation is the real situation. You are now busy confronting a problem that only exists in your mind.

Any response, at this point, is going to be out of proportion to the original problem. The normal reaction to the original problem is most likely some degree of emotional distress. If you have been laid off from a job, you may be feeling some combination of tense, worried, anxious, sad, irritated, frustrated, or angry. All of these are normal emotions for the experience. However, that inner voice may be busy exaggerating, " This is horrible and terrible. It is the world’s worst thing. You will never find another job. You are a hopeless and helpless person. No one will ever hire you. You won’t be able to pay your bills. You will lose everything you have. You should just give up." With such a running dialogue you will soon fall into depression or become enraged at your imagined mistreatment. In a deep depression you may decide that the situation is hopeless and become suicidal. In a state of rage you may act in an inappropriate, violent manner towards your former employer. Either reaction is too intense because the response is to a situation you have created in your mind. Change your mind, your attitude, and the problem can shrink back to its original size. The original problem may be bad enough but it is not the catastrophe you have invented.

To change your attitude you must change the inner dialogue. To change the dialogue you must catch it in action. To do this you have to pay attention to yourself. You must engage in self-observation and listen for that inner voice.

The next time that you find yourself feeling "bad" don’t start asking, "Who did this to me?" Don’t start looking around for the external cause of your problems. What you should do is to ask yourself, "What have I been thinking?" "What have I been telling my self?" You may find that your inner dialogue has put you deep into emotional distress

Efforts and knowledge !!!

A giant ship engine failed. The ship's owners tried one expert after another, but none of them could figure but how to fix the engine.

Then they brought in an old man who had been fixing ships since he was a young.
He carried a large bag of tools with him, and when he arrived, he immediately went to work.
He inspected the engine very carefully, top to bottom.

Two of the ship's owners were there, watching this man, hoping he would know what to do. After looking things over, the old man reached into his bag and pulled out a small hammer.
He gently tapped something. Instantly, the engine lurched into life. He carefully put his hammer away. The engine was fixed!

A week later, the owners received a bill from the old man for Ten thousand rupees.

"What?!" the owners exclaimed. "He hardly did anything!"

So they wrote the old man a note saying, "Please send us an itemized bill."

The man sent a bill that read:

Tapping with a hammer...... ......... ........ Rs. 2.00
Knowing where to tap.......... ......... ...... Rs, 9,998.00


Effort is important, but knowing where to make an effort makes all the difference ...

Corporate Life....

Have you heard the story of “The Washer man and the Foolish Donkey”?

To refresh your memory, and for the benefit of those who have not grown up listening to this moral story, it goes like this…

There was once a washer man who had a donkey and a dog. One night when the whole world was sleeping, a thief broke into the house, the washer man was fast asleep but the donkey and the dog were awake. The dog decided not to bark since the master did not take good care of him and wanted to teach him a lesson. The donkey got worried and said to the dog that if he doesn't bark, the donkey will have to do something himself. The dog did not change his mind and the donkey started braying loudly. Hearing the donkey bray, the thief ran away, the master woke up and started beating the donkey for braying in the middle of the night for no reason.

Moral of the story “One must not engage in duties other than his own"

Now take a new look at the same story…

The washer man was a well educated man from a premier management institute. He had the fundas of looking at the bigger picture and thinking out of the box. He was convinced that there must be some reason for the donkey to bray in the night. He walked outside a little and did some fact finding, applied a bottom up approach, figured out from the ground realities that there was a thief who broke in and the donkey only wanted to alert him about it. Looking at the donkey's extra initiative and going beyond the call of the duty, he rewarded him with lot of hay and other perks and became his favorite pet. The dog's life didn't change much, except that now the donkey was more motivated in doing the dog's duties as well. In the annual appraisal the dog managed a “meets requirement”. Soon the dog realized that the donkey is taking care of his duties and he can enjoy his life sleeping and lazing around. The donkey was rated as “star performer". The donkey had to live up to his already high performance standards. Soon he was over burdened with work and always under pressure and now is looking for a job rotation…

Disclaimer:
All characters in the story are not at all imaginary. Any resemblance to person living or dying of work is purely intentional.

Voice of Love - Emotional Maturity

Got this one through mail from a friend.. a wonderful read on emotional maturity...
The husband and wife gifted themselves a new car for their first wedding anniversary. They drove downtown, zipped through the beach road, watched a movie in a drive-in theatre, and finally returned home. They didn't have the garage facility. So the car was parked in the street. To their utter shock, when they woke up the next morning, the car was missing. The car was stolen. First car, first wedding anniversary gift, and they had enjoyed the car for just a day. The wife couldn't take it. With misty eyes she sank into the sofa. The husband too was a little jolted, but his love for his wife prevailed over the moment. He hugged her from behind, and said, “The car is lost. You can feel heavy about it. The car is lost. You can take it easy. Either way the car is lost. Then, why not take it easy.” She gave him a cold stare and the moment passed. Two months later the police recovered the car from one of the car-robbery-gangs, and the car was returned to the husband. That very evening, while driving back home from the police station, the husband rammed the car against a truck. This time it was his turn. He couldn't take it. On returning home, with misty eyes he sank into the sofa. Of course jolted, yet her love for him prevailed over the moment. This time, she hugged him from behind, and said, “The car is rammed. You can feel heavy about it. The car is rammed. You can take it easy. Either way the car is rammed. Then, why not take it easy.”
A logical question: When the car is lost or rammed, how can anyone take it easy? But what else can you do? Feel heavy, if you want; take it easy, if you want - either way, after the emotional drama, what has to be done has to be done.The police complaint has to be lodged; the car has to be sent to the workshop; the insurance has to be claimed… what has to be done has to be done.
The child has failed in one of the subjects. The father slaps the child a few times. The mother hits herself on her forehead several times and cries. After all the emotional drama, what? Now, you will have to take extra care on coaching your child on that subject - may be he will be sent for special tuition - what has to be done has to be done. You left the milk a little longer than required on the gas stove. The boiled milk is beginning to overflow from all sides of the vessel. Scream, wail, screech, get tensed, and let your BP to shoot up… after all the emotional drama, now what? You will switch the stove off, offload the milk vessel and clean the kitchen countertop. So, eventually what has to be done will be done.
From a stock market crash, to a key employee's resignation, to the death of a beloved… after the emotional drama, eventually what has to be done will be done.Here we are not discussing about not being emotional, but about avoiding the dramatic emotional reactions. Understandably, you will skip a heartbeat when you lose your vehicle, you will sink into helplessness when the child fails, legitimate tears will roll down at the loss of a beloved. Emotions - yes. Emotional
drama - no!
Emotional Maturity is not about avoiding emotions, but it is about avoiding the emotional drama. Anyways, what has to be done has to be done. Then, why the drama?

Ant & Grasshopper

U.S Version:

The Ant works hard in the withering heat all summer building its house and laying up supplies for the winter.

The Grasshopper thinks the Ant is a fool and laughs & dances & plays the summer away.

Come winter, the Ant is warm and well fed. The Grasshopper has no food or shelter so he dies out in the cold.

INDIAN Version:

The Ant works hard in the withering heat all summer building its house and laying up supplies for the winter.

The Grasshopper thinks the Ant's a fool and laughs & dances & plays the summer away.

Come winter, the shivering Grasshopper calls a press conference and demands to know why the Ant should be allowed to be warm and well fed while others are cold and starving.

NDTV, BBC, CNN show up to provide pictures of the shivering Grasshopper next to a video of the Ant in his comfortable home with a table filled with food.

The World is stunned by the sharp contrast. How can this be that this poor Grasshopper is allowed to suffer so?

Arundhati Roy stages a demonstration in front of the Ant's house.

Medha Patkar goes on a fast along with other Grasshoppers demanding that Grasshoppers be relocated to warmer climates during winter.

Amnesty International and Koffi Annan criticize the Indian Government for not upholding the fundamental rights of the Grasshopper.

The Internet is flooded with online petitions seeking support to the Grasshopper (many promising Heaven and Everlasting Peace for prompt
support as against the wrath of God for non-compliance) .

Opposition MPs stage a walkout. Left parties call for "Bharat Bandh" in West Bengal and Kerala demanding a Judicial Enquiry.

CPM in Kerala immediately passes a law preventing Ants from working hard in the heat so as to bring about equality of poverty among Ants and Grasshoppers.

BJP wants Sonia Gandhi's apology.

Lalu Prasad allocates one free coach to Grasshoppers on all Indian Railway Trains, aptly named as the 'Grasshopper Rath' (Same as we have 'Garib rath' now) .

Finally, the Judicial Committee drafts the 'Prevention of Terrorism Against Grasshoppers Act' [POTAGA], with effect from the beginning of the winter.

Arjun Singh makes 'Special Reservation' for Grasshoppers in Educational Institutions & in Government Services.

The Ant is fined for failing to comply with POTAGA and having nothing left to pay his retroactive taxes, its home is confiscated by the Government and handed over to the Grasshopper in a ceremony covered by NDTV.

Arundhati Roy calls it 'A Triumph of Justice'.

Lalu calls it 'Socialistic Justice'.

CPM calls it the 'Revolutionary Resurgence of the Downtrodden'.

Koffi Annan invites the Grasshopper to address the UN General Assembly.
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Many years later...

The Ant has since migrated to the US and set up a multi-billion dollar company in Silicon Valley..

100s of Grasshoppers still die of starvation despite reservation somewhere in India...

As a result of loosing lot of hard working Ants and feeding the Grasshoppers, India is still a developing country!!!